Humor
Newspaper advice columns are a weird tradition: "Let me ask a total stranger about my personal problems, so he can answer in front of thousands of other total strangers in nothing resembling a timely manner. And hope I don’t have to ask a follow-up question."
In a way, it's a cheaper version of therapy. Like if you pay the going hourly rate, you get a whole 45 minutes, there are no spectators to your personal problems, and there are free tissues. But for the cost of a newspaper subscription, this is what you get. And you’re going to be happy with it.
Until now.
Ever since Mordechai Schmutter began writing humor columns, people have been coming up to him and asking him questions. Most of them unprintable. And that's weird, because, as he’s demonstrated in his columns, he is not an expert on anything.
But some of the questions are printable, to the point where he has selflessly decided to start a second column - a column dedicated to answering these questions - a column that puts the "Um" in Advice Column - a column that places a prime emphasis not on embarrassing the person asking the question, but on dwarfing it with the extent to which he embarrasses himself. And rather than give advice that is helpful only for that one person in one specific situation that may no longer be relevant, he heroically gives advice that’s not actually helpful at all. That way, everyone wins.
This is his first collection of this column - a column that, above all, proves that there is no such thing as a ridiculous question. Just ridiculous answers.
Profound. Funny. Inspiring. Thought-provoking.
These 501 carefully chosen quotations are food for the mind!
Throughout the centuries Jews have used humor to cope with their history of trauma and stress. In fact, they have been sharpening their wits for over two thousand years and have always used jokes and humorous characterizations as teaching aids and as a means to illustrate, enlighten and improve. Have a Good Laugh: Jewish Jokes for the Soul presents a vast array of Jewish jokes that will surely bring a smile to your face and tickle your fancy. If you are a professional or even an amateur speaker, you can use the jokes (which are categorized by topic for easy access) to beguile your audiences at lectures, parties and presentations. And the good news is that there are no crude or offensive jokes in this book. Just good, clean fun. So enjoy this collection of Jewish humor, and hope you do have a good laugh.
The Unexpected Delivery
Moshe, the owner of a small Kosher New York deli, was being questioned by an IRS agent about his tax return. He had reported a net profit of $ 80,000 for the year. Why don t people leave me alone? the deli owner said. I work like a dog, everyone in my family helps out, the place is only closed for Jewish Holidays and Shabbat. And you want to know how I made $ 80,000? It s not your income that bothers us, the agent said. It s these travel deductions. You listed ten trips to Israel for you and your wife. Oh that? the owner said smiling. Well ... We also deliver.
On the Sixth Day
On the sixth day of creation, God turned to the angel Gabriel saying: On this day I shall create a magic land. It shall be called Israel and will stand as holy. And its magnificence will be known all over the world. And I will choose to send to this land special people of goodness, intelligence, and conviction, so the land shall prosper. I shall call these inhabitants Jews. Pardon me, God, asked Gabriel, but aren't you being too generous to these Jews? Not really. Wait and see the neighbors I m giving them.
Oy, Yoy, Yoy
Three bubbes (Jewish grandmothers) sitting on a park bench. The first one lets out a heartfelt Oy. A few minutes later, the second bubbe sighs deeply and says, Oy, vey. A few minutes later, the third lady brushes away a tear and moans, Oy, vey iz mir. To which the first bubbe replies, I thought we agreed we weren t going to talk about our children.
Lost and Found Wallet
A poor Jew finds a wallet with seven hundred dollars. At his shul he reads a notice stating that a wealthy Jew has lost his wallet and is offering a fifty dollar reward to anyone who returns it. Quickly he locates the owner giving him the wallet.
The rich man counts the money and says, I see you have already taken your reward.
The poor man responds, What are you talking about? The wealthy Jew continues, This wallet had seven hundred and fifty dollars in it when I lost it.
Both men present their case. The poor man first, then the wealthy man who concludes by saying, Rabbi, I trust you believe me. The rabbi says, Of course. The rich man smiles, and the poor man is devastated. Then the rabbi takes the wallet out of the wealthy man s hands and gives it to the poor man who found it.
What are you doing? the rich man yells angrily. The rabbi responds, You are of course an honest man, and if you say that you re missing wallet had seven hundred and fifty dollars in it, I m sure it did. But if the man who found this wallet is a liar and a thief, he wouldn t have returned it al all. Which means that this wallet must belong to somebody else. If that man steps forward, he'll get the money. Otherwise, it stays with the man who found it.
What about the money? the rich man asks. Well, we ll just have to wait until somebody finds a wallet with seven hundred and fifty dollars in it!
Have I Got a Cartoon for You!: The Moment Magazine Book of Jewish Cartoons
$17.96
$19.95
You Save:
$1.99
Sale 10% off 1 item
More Info
Indie Awards Silver Medal Winner (Nonfiction Adult Humor)
Bob Mankoff grew up Jewish in Queens, NY in the 1950s and 1960s. As a kid, he visited the Borscht Belt and reveled in the hilarious performances of some of the best Jewish comedians such as Jerry Lewis, Buddy Hackett, and Rodney Dangerfield, among others. These early experiences helped shape Mankoff's view of life and led him to become a creative master practitioner of humor and cartoons. He started his career unexpectedly by quitting a Ph.D. program in experimental psychology at The City University of New York in 1974 and submitting his cartoons to the New Yorker. Three years and over 2,000 cartoons later, he finally made the magazine and has since published over 950 cartoons. He has devoted his life to discovering just what makes us laugh and seeks every outlet to do so, from developing The New Yorker's web presence to founding The Cartoon Bank, a business devoted to licensing cartoons for use in newsletters, textbooks, magazines and other media.
In this new book, Have I Got a Cartoon for You! this successful cartoonist, speaker and author, presents his favorite Jewish cartoons. In his foreword to this entertaining collection, Mankoff shows how his Jewish heritage helped him to become a successful cartoonist, examines the place of cartoons in the vibrant history of Jewish humor, and plumbs Jewish thought, wisdom and shtik for humorous insights.
Mankoff has written: "I always think that it's strange that the Jews, The People of the Book, eventually became much better known as The People of the Joke. Strange because laughter in the Old Testament is not a good thing: When God laughs, you're toast. If you say, 'Stop me if you've heard this one, ' he does for good." A major influence on his cartoons about religion derives from Jewish culture's disputatiousness, the questioning everything just for the hell of it and then the questioning of the questioning to be even more annoying.
He recalls: "When, I was first dating my wife, who is not Jewish, we once were having what I thought was an ordinary conversation and she said, 'Why are you arguing with me?' I replied, 'I'm not arguing, I'm Jewish.' I thought that was clever. She didn't. Some humor scholars claim this stems from the practice in the Talmud of pilpul, which Leo Rosten has described as 'unproductive hair-splitting that is employed not so much to radiate clarity ... as to display one's own cleverness.' I go along with that except I like to think that some clarity and cleverness are not mutually exclusive. Anyway, that's my aim in cartoons like these. Now, am I worried that these jokes will bring His wrath down upon me down with a bolt from the blue. Not really, but every time there's a thunderstorm, I hide in the cellar."
OY! THE ULTIMATE BOOK OF JEWISH JOKES P/B
$26.99
$29.99
You Save:
$3.00
Sale 10% off 1 item
More Info
Hanukah Quizzes
Matzo Ball Humor
A Real Kosher Treat!
David Minkoff's website has attracted attention and contributions from around the world. Containing jokes to tell children, a compatibility test for couples, and humorous quips for special occasions, his book is a truly unique collection. This clever kosher compilation generates giggles galore. ---Publishers Weekly Terrific and addicting . . . guaranteed to make you laugh. ---The Reporter (New York)
"A Yiddishe Kop" is far more than Yiddish for, "A Jewish Head". It is a concept that crosses languages and cultures-that lives at the intersection of intelligence, imagination and wit. "A Yiddishe Kop" embodies the zest for challenge, the yearning for truth and clarity, and the honing of lucid deductive reasoning through the application of Jewish and worldly knowledge. The first volume was definitely one of a kind, but Gadi Pollack has made history twice with "A Yiddishe Kop 2x2", the second in this brain teasing series. In "A Yiddishe Kop 2x2", you will find entirely new scenes, engaging questions and an answer key in the back of the book. For obvious reasons, you mustn't peek at the answers! There is no choice but to fire up you "Yiddishe Kop" and go full steam ahead. Parents seeking creative, wholesome and stimulating entertainment for their children, will find what they are looking for in "A Yiddishe Kop 2x2". Parents shouldn't be surprised if they find themselves pouring over the pictures with wrinkled foreheads even before their children have had a chance to hold the book! This is the feedback we received from the previous volume and it takes no stretch of the imagination to assume "A Yiddishe Kop 2x2" will produce the same results. Put this book in the bookcase, but it won't stay there for long. "A Yiddishe Kop 2x2" will swiftly find its way to the table, come to rest on a child's knee and grab the attention of curious and intelligent eyes. "A Yiddishe Kop 2x2" offer hours of intelligent clue-finding fun for your entire family. wholesome and stimulating entertainment for their children, will find what they are looking for in "A Yiddishe Kop 2x2". Parents shouldn't be surprised if they find themselves pouring over the pictures with wrinkled foreheads even before their children have had a chance to hold the book! This is the feedback we received from the previous volume and it takes no stretch of the imagination to assume "A Yiddishe Kop 2x2" will produce the same results. Put this book in the bookcase, but it won't stay there for long. "A Yiddishe Kop 2x2" will swiftly find its way to the table, come to rest on a child's knee and grab the attention of curious and intelligent eyes. "A Yiddishe Kop 2x2" offer hours of intelligent clue-finding fun for your entire family. wholesome and stimulating entertainment for their children, will find what they are looking for in "A Yiddishe Kop 2x2". Parents shouldn't be surprised if they find themselves pouring over the pictures with wrinkled foreheads even before their children have had a chance to hold the book! This is the feedback we received from the previous volume and it takes no stretch of the imagination to assume "A Yiddishe Kop 2x2" will produce the same results. Put this book in the bookcase, but it won't stay there for long. "A Yiddishe Kop 2x2" will swiftly find its way to the table, come to rest on a child's knee and grab the attention of curious and intelligent eyes. "A Yiddishe Kop 2x2" offer hours of intelligent clue-finding fun for your entire family. will find what they are looking for in "A Yiddishe Kop 2x2". Parents shouldn't be surprised if they find themselves pouring over the pictures with wrinkled foreheads even before their children have had a chance to hold the book! This is the feedback we received from the previous volume and it takes no stretch of the imagination to assume "A Yiddishe Kop 2x2" will produce the same results. Put this book in the bookcase, but it won't stay there for long. "A Yiddishe Kop 2x2" will swiftly find its way to the table, come to rest on a child's knee and grab the attention of curious and intelligent eyes. "A Yiddishe Kop 2x2" offer hours of intelligent clue-finding fun for your entire family. will find what they are looking for in "A Yiddishe Kop 2x2". Parents shouldn't be surprised if they find themselves pouring over the pictures with wrinkled foreheads even before their children have had a chance to hold the book! This is the feedback we received from the previous volume and it takes no stretch of the imagination to assume "A Yiddishe Kop 2x2" will produce the same results. Put this book in the bookcase, but it won't stay there for long. "A Yiddishe Kop 2x2" will swiftly find its way to the table, come to rest on a child's knee and grab the attention of curious and intelligent eyes. "A Yiddishe Kop 2x2" offer hours of intelligent clue-finding fun for your entire family. t be surprised if they find themselves pouring over the pictures with wrinkled foreheads even before their children have had a chance to hold the book! This is the feedback we received from the previous volume and it takes no stretch of the imagination to assume "A Yiddishe Kop 2x2" will produce the same results. Put this book in the bookcase, but it won't stay there for long. "A Yiddishe Kop 2x2" will swiftly find its way to the table, come to rest on a child's knee and grab the attention of curious and intelligent eyes. "A Yiddishe Kop 2x2" offer hours of intelligent clue-finding fun for your entire family. t be surprised if they find themselves pouring over the pictures with wrinkled foreheads even before their children have had a chance to hold the book! This is the feedback we received from the previous volume and it takes no stretch of the imagination to assume "A Yiddishe Kop 2x2" will produce the same results. Put this book in the bookcase, but it won't stay there for long. "A Yiddishe Kop 2x2" will swiftly find its way to the table, come to rest on a child's knee and grab the attention of curious and intelligent eyes. "A Yiddishe Kop 2x2" offer hours of intelligent clue-finding fun for your entire family. This is the feedback we received from the previous volume and it takes no stretch of the imagination to assume "A Yiddishe Kop 2x2" will produce the same results. Put this book in the bookcase, but it won't stay there for long. "A Yiddishe Kop 2x2" will swiftly find its way to the table, come to rest on a child's knee and grab the attention of curious and intelligent eyes. "A Yiddishe Kop 2x2" offer hours of intelligent clue-finding fun for your entire family. This is the feedback we received from the previous volume and it takes no stretch of the imagination to assume "A Yiddishe Kop 2x2" will produce the same results. Put this book in the bookcase, but it won't stay there for long. "A Yiddishe Kop 2x2" will swiftly find its way to the table, come to rest on a child's knee and grab the attention of curious and intelligent eyes. "A Yiddishe Kop 2x2" offer hours of intelligent clue-finding fun for your entire family.
Get your brain spinning with fun! The series that challenges the Jewish mind with Jewish brain teasers that made history with over 200,000 copies sold. Here is your chance to ensure yourself hours of brain challenge, mental exercise, and enjoyment for the entire family, guaranteed!
Visual Brainteasers for the Keen Eye and Sharp Mind. What do you say about boosting your child's cognitive abilities? Great idea! We knew you'd agree. You can do it right now! Gadi Pollack's newest book of illustrations, A Yiddishe Kop, is nothing less than a thinking revolution. Your child will discover hours of enjoyment - thinking, discovering details, analyzing information, and drawing conclusions. It's intellectual development at its best! A Yiddishe Kop features many full-spread illustrations of real-life scenarios common to Torah-observant communities, each accompanied by brain teasing questions. Finding the clues and answering these questions requires a keen eye, logical reasoning, and broad thinking. Your child will need to develop creative thinking, learn how to think "out of the box," and to see the world from entirely new points of view. The benefits of this intellectual challenge come hand-in-hand with the inimitable artistic beauty of the Torah world's most sought-after artist - Gadi Pollack.
